If Someone You Love Is Struggling, Start Here

Mental health myths that can delay healing—and how mindful awareness can help

It took a long time and a lot of work before I had the vocabulary for my depression.

Until then, I lived in a foreign landscape, unable to speak my own language. Not only couldn’t I communicate with myself about what I was experiencing, I also couldn’t find the words to let others know how much I was suffering—or how they could help.

If you believe a loved one is also struggling to comprehend and express their mental health challenges, remaining by their side is one of the most compassionate things you can do. And being their ally requires understanding.

If you’re starting on this journey, in my experience, these are the eight most common myths that can cause confusion and delay healing.

8 Myths to Bust About Mental Health Challenges

Myth #1: Mental Health Challenges are Moral Failures

Mental health challenges are not a choice, a character flaw, or a moral failure.

We don’t experience them because we’re lazy, unskilled, deficient, or otherwise unworthy. Instead, like any other health challenge, they’re often the result of combinations of factors, including brain chemistry, genetics, trauma, and even accumulated stress.

Myth #2: They Look the Same for Everyone

While common depression symptoms (as an example) include sadness, loss of interest in activities, feelings of intense guilt or worthlessness, and thoughts of death and suicide, it ultimately looks different for everyone.

Some people can't get out of bed. Others become workaholics. While some experience numbness.

Whether it’s depression or any other mental health challenge, it’s helpful to understand that someone’s combination of symptoms is highly individual.

Myth #3: The Signs are Immediately Apparent

In fact, symptoms might not be apparent at all.

Many people with depression, anxiety, PTSD, or other mental health challenges remain high functioning. We maintain jobs, relationships, and social lives while battling deep internal struggles.

Although someone might seem fine at work or social gatherings, and might even seem to be succeeding, this doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling intensely in private.

Myth #4: The Solutions are Always Apparent

Similarly, there’s rarely a magic bullet that will help alleviate everyone’s mental health challenges.

Instead, effectively addressing them often requires a fair amount of trial-and-error before finding a combination of treatments and lifestyle changes that work. These can include adjusting exercise, diet, sunlight exposure, medication, and habits, and even focusing on a higher calling or life purpose.

Myth #5: Social Stigmas Don’t Exist

Many of us struggle with our mental health challenges privately because we’re keenly aware of the social stigma that society can attach to us when we speak up. Especially stereotypes around being dangerous, unpredictable, or of less value than those who don’t experience similar challenges.

It’s one of the primary reasons why 83% of those who could benefit from treatment don’t seek it out, despite mental health challenges affecting about one in five adults each year.

Myth #6: Therapy Can’t Help

While social biases about mental health challenges have decreased drastically over the past two decades, nearly half of Americans still believe that seeking therapy is a sign of weakness.

However, some data indicate that upwards of 75% of those who seek psychotherapy report some benefit, which can vary widely depending on the specific mental health challenge and the therapeutic treatment used by a licensed professional.

Bottom line: Seeking therapy requires courage and self-awareness. Many people benefit from professional support, alongside learning different personal coping strategies.

Myth #7: Medication is a Crutch

Using mental health medications isn’t a moral failing. It also doesn’t mean someone is using it as a crutch, and it isn’t a signal that they’re not trying hard enough.

Along these lines, telling someone with a mental health challenge to "just think positive" or "get over it" is like telling someone with diabetes to force their pancreas to work better.

No one questions diabetics taking insulin or people with high blood pressure taking statins, and mental health medications are no different than any other medical treatment.

Myth #8: Medications are the Only Option

Mental health medications like antidepressants were first used in the 1950s and have steadily gained popularity in the decades since.

However, it’s important to note that these medications only work for about 50% of those experiencing depression. And even among those, many experience common side effects like sexual and sleep challenges, weight gain, nausea, fatigue, and more.

Therefore, many seek alternatives, including changing diet and exercise habits, taking supplements like multivitamins and omega-3s, spending more time outdoors, or acupuncture.

Mindfulness is often recommended as well, since it can help improve emotional regulation, boost self-awareness, enhance positivity, and promote overall well-being. This goes for those experiencing mental health challenges, as well as for those supporting them.

How Can You Help Support Those with Mental Health Challenges?

You’ve taken a huge step toward mindfully walking the path alongside your loved one: giving them the gift of understanding.

Next, as you match their pace, remember that small gestures often mean the most.

Feeling heard and understood is healing for all of us. Therefore, simply checking in, listening without trying to fix everything, and continuing to include them in activities (while respecting their boundaries) can make a profound difference in their feelings of isolation.

Remember: Your consistent presence and unwavering compassion are sources of strength during their darkest moments. And supporting them through their challenges is a marathon, not a sprint.

Your willingness to stay by their side speaks volumes about the love you share.